why i hate being a girl

my eyebrows were getting bert-like so i decided to make an appt with this woman that i found on yelp who was supposed to do wonders on eyebrows, threading-wise. i've gotten my eyebrows threaded in the past, and though my experience seems to be in the minority, i think it hurts like a biscuit. one of my friends told me that she thought that threading was "ticklish" if anything. i am so jealous of her. the three times in the past that i've done it, when personal vanity got the best of me, i ended up with very watery eyes and a solemn promise to myself that i would never again subject myself to such treachery. every single time, after the nice woman has finished doing one brow i have always contemplated leaving before she did the other because i just couldn't take the pain and discomfort anymore.

the last time i got it done was before jelli's wedding, where the eyebrow lady commented to me "oh boy you like to keep your eyebrows thick, huh?" and i sheepishly grinned, apologizing for my inattention to eyebrow grooming.

so today i went to get it done and took the bus through golden gate park to the small salon where a nice chinese lady started doing her threading thing. i think part of it is that i psych myself out and can think of nothing else but the contact that the string is making to my face and find myself bracing and clenching. it's similar to when i recently repierced one of my ears. I almost had a panic attack when she came at me with the gun and the build up of suspense nearly did me in. the punching of the earring through my ear actually didn't hurt much, it was that countdown to the squeeze of the piercing gun that made me lurch forward involuntarily.

so i sat there with clenched body and watery eyes and the nice lady tells me about how the other day, her client actually FELL ASLEEP while she was getting her eyebrows done, because it was just that relaxing. wow. i personally saw stars, it was really lovely.

anyways, so now my eyebrows are clean and i guess that's fabulous but gosh i wish it were in style that everyone had au naturel eyebrows. though i concede to the experts' assessment that well shaped eyebrows "open up the face," there must be some other way!